Before diving into the Bible‘s perspective on kissing, it’s important to understand that kissing is a universal sign of love and affection between individuals. Whether it’s a gentle peck or a passionate embrace, kisses convey deep emotions. However, the question often arises: is kissing good or bad? And when does it cross the line into sinful territory?
The Bible doesn’t explicitly state that kissing is a sin, but it does emphasize the importance of purity and respect in relationships. As a Christian, I’ve often wondered about the types of kisses we should avoid. Is it the passionate French kissing or any kissing before marriage? The Bible teaches us to honor God with our bodies, and this includes our interactions with both women and men. It’s crucial to seek guidance from the Holy Spirit to make the right decisions. Personally, setting clear boundaries has helped me navigate these complexities, ensuring that my actions align with my faith and respect for others.
Kissing in the Bible: A Ritual of Affection
The Bible offers insights into kissing as a ritual or practice shared among close family members or friends to express affection or greet each other. In 1 Peter 5:14, believers are encouraged to “Greet one another with the kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ.” This verse highlights the importance of kissing as a sign of love and unity among Christians. Similarly, in 1 Samuel 20:41, David and Jonathan kissed each other as friends, sharing a deep emotional bond: “And they kissed one another and wept with one another, David weeping the most.” These examples show that kissing was a common way to express love and affection in various relationships.
In the context of family, kissing was also a significant gesture. In Ruth 1:14, Orpah kissed her mother-in-law, demonstrating love and respect: “And Orpah kissed her mother-in-law, but Ruth clung to her.” Similarly, in Genesis 27:26-27, Isaac asked his son to come near and kiss him, showing the intimate bond between family members: “Then his father Isaac said to him, ‘Come near and kiss me, my son.’ So he came near and kissed him.” These instances reveal that kissing was a custom or tradition deeply rooted in family dynamics.
The Bible also portrays kissing as a symbol of passion and love between a husband and wife. In Song of Solomon 1:2, the intimate nature of kissing is celebrated: “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine.” This verse underscores the beauty and intensity of love within marriage.
When it comes to premarital kissing, the Bible does not provide explicit guidelines. However, in Genesis 29:9-11, Jacob kissed Rachel, his distant relative, upon meeting her. This kiss was a greeting rather than a romantic gesture, as they were not yet considering marriage: “Jacob was still talking with them when Rachel arrived with her father’s flock, for she was a shepherd. And because Rachel was his cousin—the daughter of Laban, his mother’s brother—and because the sheep and goats belonged to his uncle Laban, Jacob went over to the well and moved the stone from its mouth and watered his uncle’s flock. Then Jacob kissed Rachel, and he wept aloud.” This story shows that kissing could be a way to express excitement and affection in various contexts.
References:
- 1 Peter 5:14 ESV
- 1 Samuel 20:41 ESV
- Ruth 1:14 ESV
- Genesis 27:26-27 ESV
- Song of Solomon 1:2 ESV
- Genesis 29:9-11 NLT
Is Kissing a Sin?
Biblical Perspective on Premarital Kissing
The Bible doesn’t provide explicit examples of kissing before marriage in the context of dating, so we must consider how kissing can glorify God. The Bible tells us that whatever we do should honor Him: “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV). Understanding the intent or motive behind kissing is crucial in determining if it is sinful or glorifying to God.
Avoiding Lustful Intentions
Kissing with a lustful intent should be avoided, as the Bible warns against sexual immorality and lustful desires. In Colossians 3:5, we are instructed to “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.” Similarly, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 emphasizes the importance of sanctification and abstaining from sexual immorality. If kissing before marriage leads to lust or sexual immorality, it is a sin and should be avoided by couples who are not married.
Guarding Thoughts and Purity
Even if a couple starts having lustful thoughts, kissing should be avoided. Jesus taught, “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5:27-28 NKJV). When dating someone, it’s vital to guard your thoughts and keep your mind from straying towards lust. Even if you are engaged and planning to marry, God calls us to flee from sexual immorality and think pure thoughts: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (Philippians 4:8 ESV). If kissing leads your thoughts astray, it’s best to stop.
References:
- 1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV
- Colossians 3:5 ESV
- 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 ESV
- Matthew 5:27-28 NKJV
- Philippians 4:8 ESV
Is Kissing a Sin?
voiding Temptation in Kissing
Kissing before marriage should be avoided if it leads to sexual sin or causes a couple to stumble. The Bible teaches us to be mindful of actions that might cause others to sin: “Remember, all foods are acceptable, but it is wrong to eat something if it makes another person stumble. It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble.” (Romans 14:20-22 NLT). If kissing triggers temptation or sexual arousal, it is wise to be conservative and respect each other’s boundaries.
Respecting Personal Convictions
The Bible encourages us to follow our personal convictions. If you do not feel convicted about kissing and are not driven by lustful intent, pray and seek God’s guidance. “You may believe there’s nothing wrong with what you are doing, but keep it between yourself and God. Blessed are those who don’t feel guilty for doing something they have decided is right.” (Romans 14:22-23 NLT). However, if your boyfriend feels convicted or is more tempted, it is important to respect his desires and boundaries, even if you are personally okay with kissing.
Understanding the Impact of Making Out
Making out or French kissing involves a deeper level of intimacy and can lead to strong chemical reactions in the brain and body. According to Healthline, kissing releases hormones like oxytocin and dopamine, which stir up feelings of affection and attachment. These “happy hormones” can make you feel giddy and euphoric, increasing the desire for more. Romantic kissing can lead to sexual arousal and is often a driving force behind decisions to have sex. The longer and more passionately you kiss, the more testosterone is released, further enhancing sexual arousal.
References:
- Romans 14:20-22 NLT
- Romans 14:22-23 NLT
Is Kissing a Sin?
Understanding the Risks of Making Out
Making out can lead to strong chemical reactions and hormonal responses, such as the release of dopamine and oxytocin, which create feelings of affection and attachment. These hormones can increase sexual arousal, making it challenging to avoid lust and sexual immorality. Since God designed sex to bond a husband and wife in marriage, engaging in activities that mimic this bond outside of marriage can lead to sin.
Setting Boundaries in Dating
To honor God and maintain purity in a relationship, it’s crucial to set physical boundaries. Avoiding making out until marriage is a significant boundary that helps prevent sexual sin. This decision respects both individuals’ convictions and intent to wait until marriage for sex. My husband and I set this boundary during our dating period, which helped us honor God and each other.
Personal Decisions and Convictions
Deciding to kiss before marriage is a personal decision guided by convictions and prayer. If there are doubts or temptation, it’s wise to wait until marriage to kiss. Respecting each other’s boundaries and convictions is essential in a Christian dating context. If you’re waiting for marriage, remember that the wait is worth it to honor God and prevent future regret.
References:
- Romans 14:20-22 NLT
- Romans 14:22-23 NLT
Biblical Examples of Kissing
The Bible never explicitly states that kissing is bad. Instead, it indicates that kissing is acceptable in various situations. For instance, Genesis records Isaac kissing his father Jacob, and Jacob kissing his cousin Rachel. These examples show kissing between relatives, family members, and even believers. The Bible also highlights the “holy kiss” in several passages, such as Romans 16:16 and 1 Corinthians 16:20, which is a non-sexual greeting among Christians.
The Significance of the Holy Kiss
The “holy kiss” is a kiss that does not cause sexual stimulation. It is a command from the apostles in the New Testament for believers to greet each other with a pure and respectful kiss. This type of kissing is considered good and is encouraged between husbands and wives, as well as among family and friends. The Bible never condemns this type of kissing.
Avoiding Youthful Lusts
Kissing can be wrong if it violates the principles outlined in 2 Timothy 2:22, which advises us to “flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” This verse emphasizes the importance of avoiding lustful desires, especially those experienced during adolescence. However, this warning does not apply to married couples, who are free to express their love through kissing.
References:
- Genesis 27:26-27
- Genesis 29:11
- Romans 16:16
- 1 Corinthians 16:20
- 2 Timothy 2:22 (NASB)
Is Kissing a Sin?
Biblical Guidance on Kissing Before Marriage
The Bible does not explicitly address kissing before marriage, but it does emphasize the importance of avoiding sexual immorality, including abstaining from sex until marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18, 7:2). While kissing is not sexual intercourse, opinions vary among Christians regarding its appropriateness before marriage. Some believe it is acceptable, while others prefer to wait until the wedding day. Ultimately, the decision lies between the Christian couple and God.
The Role of Intentions and Temptation
Kissing itself is not a sin, but if it leads to temptation, it should be avoided. Christians are advised to refrain from actions that might cause others to fall into sin (Romans 14:13; 1 Corinthians 8:9). If kissing before marriage could lead to temptation, it is wise to abstain until the wedding kiss. Many Christian couples choose this path to prevent falling into temptation.
Respecting Boundaries in Relationships
When dating another believer, it is crucial to establish clear boundaries early on. Open communication with your boyfriend or girlfriend about your comfort levels and potential temptations is essential. If kissing makes you uncomfortable or could lead to temptation, express your feelings openly. Respect for each other’s boundaries is vital in a healthy relationship. If your partner does not respect your opinion and boundaries, it may be best to reconsider the relationship.
References:
- 1 Corinthians 6:18, 7:2
- Romans 14:13
- 1 Corinthians 8:9
Closing Thoughts
Navigating the complexities of kissing before marriage can be challenging, but remember that God is always there to guide you. Lean on His wisdom and the counsel of the Holy Spirit to make decisions that honor both your faith and your relationship. Kissing is a beautiful expression of love and affection, but it’s essential to ensure it doesn’t lead to temptation or sin. By setting clear boundaries and maintaining open communication with your partner, you can build a strong, God-honoring foundation for your future together. Trust in God’s plan for your love story, and let your actions reflect your commitment to purity and respect for one another.
I hope you were encouraged by today’s post. Have a wonderful day.
Blessings,
David John
https://biblerules.com/